The Lost Boys is not only one of my favourite movies in general, but it’s my favourite vampire movie. Yes, I’ll take it over any of the Dracula movies (apologies to the Count). It’s the perfect combination of funny and scary, with the kind of charismatic (and slightly unhinged) vampires that draw you in against your better judgment. It’s no surprise that Joss Whedon took inspiration from it when he was coming up with Buffy. If you haven’t seen the Lost Boys, please do (but you can skip the comic books and sequels).
The Good Bad Flicks YouTube channel takes an in-depth look at the Lost Boys that’s well worth a watch (there are major spoilers, though– this one’s only for the fans and the compulsively curious). Give it a watch:
Have you seen the Lost Boys? What did you think? Share in the comments…
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As soon as I heard about Morbius coming out, I was excited to see it. And then the reviews started coming in.
Spoilers Ahead
I should mention that I haven’t read the comic book, so I won’t be comparing the movie to it at all. My SO has read it and he said he was never a fan of the character, who started out as a Spider-Man villain and ended up being more of a neutral character. If movie Morbius is anything like comic book Morbius, I can see why he wasn’t a fan.
Morbius is about Michael Morbius, a man with a chronic (and ultimately deadly) disease that he’s vowed to cure. In pursuit of a cure he creates artificial blood that has somehow saved more lives than penicillin, but still can’t save his own. So he crosses over to the unethical side of research, importing (sigh) vampire bats from Costa Rica and using them to create a serum that when fused with his own DNA will, theoretically, finally be the cure he’s been looking for.
And then it goes horribly wrong. Oh no– what an unforeseen tragedy that no one could have foreseen.
It wasn’t just the story and main character that were underwhelming. Starting with the opening shot of scenery suddenly interrupted by a helicopter entering from behind the camera, I felt like I’d seen this movie a thousand times before. From the cinematography to the acting to the writing– it was all just so pointless. There’s no tension or mystery at all, no artistry; and the whole thing seems rushed, like everyone involved was just trying to get it over with. Twilight was by no means a good movie, but at least it tried.
By the way, I’m no fan of Twilight, but I’d rather watch the entire movie series in one sitting than sit through Morbius again. Bring on the sparkles.
The only bright-ish spot in the entire movie was Michael’s best friend, Lucian AKA Milo (played by Eleventh Doctor, Matt Smith). Milo also has the disease Michael has and is desperate to be cured, taking the serum in secret. Michael then immediately treats Milo as though he’s a monster/pure evil because he doesn’t want to go back to a painful life and early death. At least Milo embraces being a vampire and exudes some menace, unlike mopey Michael. At no point does Michael consider finding a way to live with being a vampire, like finding a source of human blood without the need to kill people (blood bank blood maybe? Idk). He immediately concludes that his serum is a curse with intolerable side effects (i.e., becoming a vampire) and it’s best to just give up rather than try to find a way to make it work. No wonder Milo isn’t on board.
The movie ends with a predictable twist and the worst post-credit scenes I’ve seen. I’m honestly not sure why Morbius was made; it doesn’t add anything to vampire lore, and I can’t see it adding anything worthwhile to the Spider-verse (like Spider-Man, Morbius is a Marvel character licensed by Sony, so technically not part of the MCU). Milo isn’t even around anymore to possibly make things more interesting in future movies.
If you’re a stickler for watching everything Marvel related, then go ahead and watch Morbius. If you want to see a decent vampire flick, then go watch Lost Boys, or What We Do in the Shadows, or yes, even Twilight (at least you can laugh at it). The critics were right, Morbius sucks, and not in a good way.
What did you think of Morbius? Share in the comments…
If you prefer paperback, use this link to order Love Lies Bleeding from Bookshop – a portion of each sale goes directly to independent bookstores, as well as to myself. Thank you for supporting indie! ♥
If I ever run into Taika Waititi, I’m going to thank him for creating What We Do in the Shadows. Well, more likely I’ll probably ramble awkwardly until he walks away. But if I were capable of talking like a person, I’d thank him.
Mild Spoilers
If you like vampires and referential humour, then the season 1 episode “The Trial” is made for you. In this episode we meet the “Vampire Council,” who rule over all vampires, and pass judgment on those who break the rules (for example, turning a baby, or “too much defiling”).
The Council is made up of actors who’ve played vampires in other shows and movies. They’re all going by their real first names, with the actors playing themselves as actual vampires (I can believe it for a couple of them). Not only have they played vampires, but their vampire characters’ looks have been faithfully recreated in their hair and makeup (and in one case wardrobe, or lack thereof). They even mention a few members of the Council who couldn’t make it to the meeting, just to get a few more references in. It’s brilliant.
If I wasn’t already swooning enough over the Council, they went and brought the well from Interview with the Vampire into it (the one that saw the end of Claudia). I probably missed even more references– I’m definitely going to have to watch the episode again.
Aside from the Council, there’s also an earlier cameo in this episode that had me laughing so loud I scared my cats a little.
What We Do in the Shadows (at least so far) is the vampire show we all needed. I can’t wait to see what comes next.
What do you think? What’s your ultimate vampire show or episode? Share in the comments…
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“Into every generation a slayer is born: one girl in all the world, a chosen one. She alone will wield the strength and skill to fight the vampires, demons, and the forces of darkness; to stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their number. She is the Slayer.”
And it all started with one movie.
Part Clueless (before Clueless) with a touch of Heathers, and an undead element, BtVS is a fun, if not fantastic, 90s teen movie. Then again, it was never meant to be great cinema– the idea behind it was ‘let’s make a monster movie where the monster-hunter is a teenage girl, and let’s give her a silly name’ (I’m paraphrasing, if you couldn’t tell). Who would have thought that this movie would (or could) morph into an awesome TV series, with a female action hero (groundbreaking at the time), and some of the best vampires this side of Santa Carla.
Sarah Michelle Geller as Buffy in the TV series
Watching the movie, you can’t help but compare it to the (far superior) series it inspired. The movie even gives us glimpses of future characters on the show (Principal Flutie, Cordy, Giles, Spike). While I’m grateful the movie kicked things off, I’m also really glad that some things never made it to the series. There’s nothing quite so cringy as watching Kristy Swanson demonstrate Buffy’s vampire-sensing skills by moaning and clutching her stomach in faux menstrual-cramp agony every time she’s in the vicinity of the undead. I think that was supposed to represent some kind of primordial woman power. Gold star for effort, I guess, but big miss on the execution.
I’m also glad they changed the vampires significantly in the series. The vamps in the movie mostly skulk around making guttural noises, laughing maniacally, and showing off their new goth makeovers. They also have floppy elf ears. I get that the movie was supposed to be campy and goofy, but those ears are an…interesting…choice (mind you– this was well before vampires all looked like models). Aside from those issues, Benny (David Arquette) and Amilyn (Paul Reubens) are entertaining, getting a lot of the best lines in the film. Lothos (Rutger Hauer) makes a decent Master Vampire, although he would’ve been more menacing without the Halloween-costume cape.
The ears aren’t terrible, but I can’t imagine Angel or Spike rocking this look.
As for the non-vampires, while Buffy does kick ass, more or less, Kristy Swanson is pretty lacklustre, especially when you see what Sarah Michelle Geller did in the role. Swanson doesn’t really seem to get the character, and she plays a teenager as though she’s only ever read a description of one.
Luke Perry as “Pike” is actually pretty good. Both his character and his portrayal are enjoyable– I could have done with more of him.
I have nothing bad to say about Donald Sutherland as Merrick, Buffy’s original watcher. The man is a treasure. In fact, if the movie ever gets remade, I vote Sutherland’s son Kiefer as the new Merrick.
Despite my complaints, I do like this movie. It’s fun, there are vampires– what’s not to like? I think the best way to view BtVS is not as a movie unto itself, but rather as the early draft for the awesomeness that is to come. Watch it, laugh with it (or at it, as the case may be), and appreciate Buffy the series all the more.
After Amilyn has lost an arm:
Amilyn: We’re immortal, Buffy; we can do anything. Buffy: Oh yeah? Clap!
If you prefer paperback, use this link to order Love Lies Bleeding from Bookshop – a portion of each sale goes directly to independent bookstores, as well as to myself. Thank you for supporting indie! ♥
Cheers,
Aspasía S. Bissas
[Note: this review was originally posted on one of my older blogs. I’m re-posting it here with major revisions and new photos. If it seems familiar, you might have read the original version way back :)]
Happy long weekend to all who have one (and happy weekend to everyone else)! If you’ve read and enjoyed any of my books, and have a minute to spare, please show this author some love and leave a rating and/or review (links below)!
Aspasía S. Bissas 