Cheers,
Aspasía S. Bissas
Quote of the Day
3 Reasons You Should Ignore Your Inner Critic
To be creative, especially if you’re creative for a living, is to be in a constant state of worry. Will anyone be interested in my work? Will they like it? What if they hate it? The worst is when the worry morphs into self-criticism and you start doubting yourself and everything you do. My own inner critic nags at me that my books aren’t any good, that I should never have pursued writing in the first place, and I should just quit now. If I let them, my inner demons would probably take up as much space in my head as my plots and characters.
But my inner critic is a liar, and so is yours.
Your inner critic is nothing more than an amalgamation of doubts, anxieties, and insecurities. We inadvertently feed our critics because smart creators know there’s always room for improvement, so we think we should pay attention to what our critic tells us. We definitely shouldn’t,
Why you should ignore your inner critic
- It’s counterproductive. Your inner critic is both a poor judge and a compulsive liar. If you need some honest feedback to help improve your work, ask a friend or colleague, or join one of the many groups (both online and in real life) where your fellow creatives and/or interested volunteers will be happy to help. You could even hire someone like an editor to assess your work. But your inner critic will never offer anything useful, and you’ll waste your time focusing on the wrong things.
- It undermines you. If you keep thinking that you’re not as good as you could/should be, or telling yourself that you suck, then even if you don’t really believe it, eventually it will chip away at your confidence. Before long you’ll be second-guessing everything you produce– and might even end up too stressed to finish a project. If you do manage to complete something, your eroded confidence in your abilities will make it impossible to pitch your work to anyone or promote it. If you’re not convinced your work is great, how are you going to convince anyone else?
- You might end up believing it. There’s nothing wrong with choosing not to pursue your creative skills as a career, as long as you’re doing it for the right reasons. Unfortunately I’ve known too many talented people who’ve quit because they convinced themselves they weren’t all that good. Even worse, most stopped being creative for fun too, and that’s truly a shame. The world is better with your art/writing/music/whatever in it, and to let your inner critic convince you that you shouldn’t bother is a loss for everybody. No one is inspired by accountants, no matter how awesome they are at their job (apologies to all the amazing accountants I know), but that photo or poem or sketch you shared with friends or on social media could get someone through a bad day, or encourage them to start creating.
How should you deal with your inner critic?
An article on the Brockton Writers Series site suggests mindfully addressing your inner critic. The author offers some good suggestions, such as waiting the emotions out (they will pass) or agreeing with your inner critic and going forward anyway (for example, you’d say something like: “I should just quit now…and I will go ahead and write another paragraph.” Basically: acknowledge your inner critic, and then do your thing anyway. In other words: ignore it.
What’s important at the end of the day is to keep at it, no matter what that nagging voice in the back of your head tells you. Whether you’re creative for love or money, go ahead and ignore your inner critic. Or tell it off. Or sit and have a polite conversation with it– whatever you need to do. As long as you don’t believe it.
How do you deal with your inner critic? Share in the comments.
And while you’re here, don’t forget to download my books:
Love Lies Bleeding: Smashwords (all formats), Barnes & Noble, Kobo, Apple Books
FREE Blood Magic: Smashwords (all formats), Barnes & Noble, Kobo, Apple Books
FREE Tooth & Claw: Smashwords (all formats), Barnes & Noble, Kobo, Apple Books
If you prefer paperback, use this link to order Love Lies Bleeding from Bookshop – a portion of each sale goes directly to independent bookstores, as well as to myself. Thank you for supporting indie! ♥
Cheers,
Aspasía S. Bissas
Happy International Haiku Day
Haiku by Aspasia S. Bissas
Darkness unfurling
Weary, bruised, the sun retreats
Rest for tomorrow
It’s International Haiku Day today! You might remember being taught in English class that a haiku is a poem consisting of three lines, with five syllables in the first line, seven in the second, and five in the third. Traditional haiku are about nature or “ephemeral beauty,” but not every writer follows tradition.
My first poem (above) was inspired by a challenge to write a haiku about “unfurling” (I wrote it before I realized we weren’t supposed to use the word “unfurling” in it– oops). The next poem was inspired by a friendly dog that used to show up in our yard, looking to play. It turned out he belonged to the neighbours (he and they have since moved).
Haiku 2 by Aspasia S. Bissas
Sad dog in our yard,
Barking an invitation.
Where do you belong?
Poetry not your thing? I’ve got you covered– download my novel and short stories:
Love Lies Bleeding: Smashwords (all formats), Barnes & Noble, Kobo, Apple Books
FREE Blood Magic: Smashwords (all formats), Barnes & Noble, Kobo, Apple Books
FREE Tooth & Claw: Smashwords (all formats), Barnes & Noble, Kobo, Apple Books
If you prefer paperback, use this link to order Love Lies Bleeding from Bookshop – a portion of each sale goes directly to independent bookstores, as well as to myself. Thank you for supporting indie! ♥
Find out more about International Haiku Day here.
Find out more about haiku poetry here.
Cheers,
Aspasía S. Bissas
3 Good Reasons to Read Fiction, According to Science
There’s something magical about reading fiction. A story is basically just a series of symbols arranged in a particular order on a page (or screen). And yet, your mind translates those symbols into images, events, and people that feel real. It puts you into the minds of characters and lets you see through their eyes. You hold your breath when they’re in danger, you cringe sympathetically when they’ve done something awkward. Reading fiction puts you in another world and brings that world to life. I can’t think of anything more truly magical than that.
But it isn’t only magic. Science is finding all kinds of ways that reading fiction in particular can benefit you. Here are three:
Reading fiction relieves stress: Reading is enjoyable– it makes you feel good and forces you to take a break from regular life. While reading helps you forget your problems, it can also help you understand them and cope with them better. And reading fiction has been found to relieve stress more than other relaxing forms of media, like music or TV.
Reading fiction helps with cognitive and social skills: Reading challenges your brain. Among other things, it teaches new perspectives and viewpoints. As you read about other people and places, you learn to empathize, to understand different points of view, and to get along in diverse situations. In essence, reading fiction trains you for the real world.
Reading fiction can help you live longer: Studies have shown that reading helps prevent cognitive decline, which is associated with decreased life expectancy. Aside from that, according to at least one study (see “Further Reading”), people who read more fiction live longer, on average.
Bonus: Because reading fiction can mimic what we feel during real-life interactions with other people, it’s been found to satisfy the need for human connection. If lockdowns and distancing have been getting to you, reading a good book can help you through it.
Reading fiction makes you happier and less stressed, teaches you about the world and other people, helps you feel more connected, improves your mind, and can even help you live longer. What more could you ask?
Want to get all those benefits of reading fiction right now? Download my books….
Love Lies Bleeding: Smashwords, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, Apple Books
FREE Blood Magic: Smashwords, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, Apple Books
FREE Tooth & Claw: Smashwords, Barnes & Noble, Kobo, Apple Books
If you prefer paperback, use this link to order Love Lies Bleeding from Bookshop – a portion of each sale goes directly to independent bookstores, as well as to myself. Thank you for supporting indie! ♥
Further Reading:
Why Getting Lost in a Book Is so Good for You
Even mild cognitive impairment appears to substantially increase risk for death
9 Ways Reading Makes Us Happier and More Creative
Does Reading Fiction Make Us Better People?
The Real World Benefits of Reading Fiction
7 Benefits of Reading Literary Fiction You May Not Know
Cheers,
Aspasía S. Bissas
IWD: Two Poems
Untitled by Wang Zhenyi, mathematician, astronomer, poet
It’s made to believe
women are the same as Men;
Are you not convinced
Daughters can also be heroic?
The Silenced by Aspasía S. Bissas
You’re too loud, they said;
be quiet.
You don’t belong in the world;
stay hidden.
But we put our voices in everything we touched,
And bared our souls to history.
In silence our voices grew,
No more will we go unseen.
Happy International Women’s Day!
Aspasía S. Bissas
